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Indian Woman and Hispanic Man

True story of a Canadian lady of Indian heritage and her boyfriend, a Hispanic Canadian man.

They are fighting to gain aceptance from her family.



CM’s Story

I am a 22 year old woman and my boyfriend is 25. We met over the internet at one of our church websites. I am a Christian by choice and my boyfriend has been brought up in the faith. I have been brought up as an Indian with all the religions and traditions and I still respect them, but I have my own views on religion just as everyone else does.

So I met my boyfriend and at the time we were just talking as friends. Rapidly we became very very close and (long story short), decided to take things onto the next level and begin dating! We had WAY too much in common and I spoke with his family (sister, bro in law, mom and dad) and eventually I told my mom about him too. Now my mom is very nice and sweet and she respects what I do and what makes me happy. My dad on the other hand, is very old fashioned and has gone through many rough experiences. He had a girlfriend whom he had gotten pregnant, and she had an abortion. My cousins also had gotten caught dating so my dad’s always been on constant alert with me.

During my upbringing, of course, I couldn't communicate with boys but I grew up like Saved by the Bell (the tv show), where all the girls and boys collaborated together into one big posse. I finally met a man that I enjoy being with and of course we met and had instant chemistry. My dad ended up finding out by seeing all the calling cards, because it is a long distance relationship.

To my surprise, my dad was calm about it and said he would like to meet him. I have never brought any of my previous boyfriends home because I didn't feel they were 'the one' but with this man I absolutely do. So after my boyfriend had agreed, my dad requested to meet his father as well. They both agreed to come and visit. My dad has a drinking problem and since it was my birthday that weekend, I told my dad that all I want for my birthday, is for him to not drink this weekend while they will be here. He said "of course, I'm not a fool" So I felt quite good about that weekend...

Of course, I should've known better. My dad ended up drinking, started talking about all the wealth that we have, etc etc. My dad didn't even bother asking my boyfriend any questions. His father and him pledged their love for me and my dad was soo pissed drunk, simply nodded and walked over to the fridge. His English is very poor for one. But he has no affection in his tone or anything so talking to my dad, is like talking to a brick wall.

The whole weekend was basically *blah* And once they had left, and we dropped them off, my dad said he needed to ‘tally up the scores’ to see if he would be a good fit for me. And I asked what in the world is there to tally up? You've seen him, so you either like him or you don't. Basically, my dad bribed me, with cars, condos, that he'll quit drinking, and even become a christian but to not get with this man. And his reasons? "He's too tall, I don’t think he's attractive enough for you, I don't like his community.” All these crazy points!

My dad is okay if I get with a white guy, or Indian guy but the fact that he's Hispanic and looks BLACK. My dad is having a fit over it. We have a major violent, physical abuse history but I had moved out for a year and it took that move for him to stop hitting me. But now it's all the mental abuse. He's threatened to kill me, or kill himself, and it really does hit you emotionally. I am soo sad and heartbroken because I love my man, but I love my parents. I just want my dad to accept him but he's saying it's going to be embarrasing,  people are going to laugh at us, black and indians don’t mix etc etc. And to make things hard, I'm the only child If there was another one, it wouldn't feel as much of a pressure but it does now. So please, someone tell me your insight on my story!!!

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